I wanted to find the perfect picture and words for today, the day Jim would have turned 57. The picture I took of them after a big win in Jakes senior football season reminded me I had the perfect words already; Jim’s own words. He was attending an annual prayer/study retreat in southern Louisiana and wrote this February 28, 2008, at the mid-way point between Jake's death and his own.
“Until this morning, I have not been much on trying to imagine how Heaven might be in any specific or literal way. As I was taking my morning exercise, about 7 o’clock, though, I had a powerful and comforting idea which I believe was sent from God and for which I am deeply grateful. This idea may well not turn out to be the way Heaven is for me or anyone else, I understand. It may be better! God obviously will do what God knows to be best. At this point in my life, while Jake’s death and my grieving are still active and sad, this little scene was wonderful.
As I was walking around the main grounds of the campus, toward the river and away from the large dormitory, I faced, at a distance, the statue of St. Joseph, earthly father of Jesus, holding the baby Jesus. The big white fence had its entire gate removed so I am able to walk without stopping through the gate and down a great, huge oak alley__ towards Joseph and Jesus. Behind them is the levee and beyond the levee, Old Man, the Mississippi River.
The idea that came to me is the white fence; gate not only open, but removed and put aside so that there was no hindrance to entry into Heaven. (The gates here at Manresa were down and put aside). The walk from the entrance to St. Joseph was short, easy, and the weather was perfect. The view was surrounded by the magnificent oaks. It was perfect. Though the statue of Joseph holds the Christ Child, I imagined Joseph not only introducing me to the risen Jesus, but also to my son Jacob, also risen and waiting. Then the fields outside the oak alley became places Jake and I could play catch__baseball or football again. Except now I could throw better and we’d “get it right this time”__our relationship; and it would be forever.
Thank you, God for this beautiful thought this morning.”
I pray it is every bit as wonderful and so much more than you saw that day, Jim!
Love, Kath
